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Just wanted to update you...


If you would like to come to celebrate Rob's life, we are going to have a celebration of life on Friday (4/6) between the hours of 6:30 to 8:30 pm at our church - at the corner of 4500 S and 2700 E (the pagoda church) in Salt Lake.


Saturday (4/7) we will have a memorial service at 12 noon at the church as well. You may come to the church an hour before to visit us before the memorial service, if you so choose.

We thank you for your support. We love you. Rob is grateful for the love and support you have shown us.

Rob, you are missed. We love you.

With love,

Jacob, Gabrielle, Noah, Jessica, and of course, Robert.

xoxo


I wanted to share the obituary that will run in Thursday's paper...

Robert Edward Finlinson 1970 ~ 2012

Rob passed away courageously due to lung cancer on April 3, 2012. He was born November 3, 1970 to the best parents: Elaine and Steven Finlinson. He was the 3rd of seven great kids: Doug {Elizabeth}, Gregg {Kim}, Randall, Tarali {single and available}, Richard {Sharon} and Angie {Chad Killpack}. He married the most beautiful woman in the world, Jessica Anne {Tice} Finlinson in the LDS Salt Lake Temple. Together they had the coolest four children, Jacob, Gabrielle, Kayli, and Noah. His twin brother, Randall, and his daughter, Kayli, preceded Robert in death.

He lived a full life in half the time.  In his short time he served as a full-time LDS missionary in the Japan, Sendai Mission.  He climbed the Tetons, Mayan pyramids, and assisted in the sculpting of the angel Moroni topping the new LDS temples. He enjoyed the beauties of this earth.

In lieu of flowers or plants, the family would prefer donations made to the Robert E. & Jessica A. Finlinson Family Trust Fund. Chocolate will also be accepted. Friends and enemies {he didn’t have one} may visit between the hours of 6:30 to 8:30 pm on Friday, April 6 also at 11 am on Saturday, April 7. A memorial service will be held Saturday at 12 noon, both will be held at the LDS chapel (pagoda chapel) on the corner of 4500 S & 2700 E, SLC, UT.

**Rob wrote the above obituary before he died. With the diagnosis of lung cancer, he started and completed his mechanical engineering degree at the University of Utah. OttoBock Healthcare employed him for nine years, where he designed prosthetic components for amputees. He loved his work, his company, and the people with whom he associated. We are so incredibly grateful for the many years of support you gave him (you know what you have done and we have felt the difference – thank you). Words cannot express our gratitude.

We are grateful for the many who have supported our family over the years, including: CNS (Barb, Camille, and Dana), Dr. Litton, Dr. Macpherson, Jessica’s work, family, friends, neighbors, and ward members.

Rob was the epitome of Christ-like love and service. He was a man without guile. He looked for ways to help others, always generous with his time and talents. Robert was an amazing son, brother, dad, uncle, and friend.  Jessica was so blessed to have Rob as a husband for nearly 19 years and they look forward to being with each other again. He was the best Dad! Rob was kind, patient, and a wonderful teacher to his children and many others. Though a gentle and quiet man, he had a strong voice and would often surprise and inspire us by saying something funny, clever, or wise.

Rob, we already miss you, may you breathe deep and climb on. We love you.

Oh, Say Can You Sleep?

Still not sleeping. The lack of sleep is getting old. Still coughing. A lot. When I had pneumonia (two times), there came a point I was unable to cough. It was as if I had forgotten how. This is how my poor husband is frequently. Yesterday, Camille, our other hospice nurse came to visit. Rob had taken off his oxygen for a few minutes before her arrival. Camille took his oxygen level...it was 75%. With his oxygen levels that low, Camille is afraid that Rob will become confused about his meds or fall. Often that is what happens when one does not get enough oxygen to one's brain. Because of his lack of oxygen, his heart has to work harder. After walking back into the room, Rob's heart rate was beating 120 beats per minute. After sitting down and having the oxygen on for about five minutes, his oxygen was up to 86% and his heartrate was down to 114 bpm. On Monday, Rob weighed 153 (this is up from the previous week). Barb was a little concerned. She was worried that he might be retaining water. She told us that we needed to ring her immediately if his weight increased to 154. Well, yesterday, he weighed 155.6. It was decided that we would wait another day and see if he lost or gained any weight the following day. When we went to bed last night, Rob's ankles and feet were swollen. This morning when he weighed himself, he was 161. I rang Camille. She called Jane, the palliative care doc, and she prescribed a diuretic. This should help him lose that excess water. Camille thought it prudent to make another visit today. Wearing oxygen, his oxygen level was at 77%. Clearly, he isn't getting enough. His feet and ankles were huge when she came. His blood pressure was low yesterday and today. 108/58. Camille says that once we get the excess water out and back into his veins, his blood pressure will get higher. The new drugs should help a little with all the fluid in his lungs. So, for now this is the plan... If Rob's weight does not go up or down by Sunday, we call the on-call nurse and let him know. We have graduated from two visits a week to three. Wahoo. And last, but not least, Rob is now going to be sleeping in his very own hospital bed. It arrived today. He is especially excited about giving the kids rides on the bed. The head goes up and down as does the foot of the bed. There are even side-rails! I am quite excited about the four-inch blocks coming off our bed. I get to sleep at a 180 degree angle again!!!

Live Long & Prosper

What a week! Poor Rob. He is such a trooper. Can I just tell you how lame it is not to be able to breathe? In two words: it sucks.

Early Sunday morning, Rob woke up and started coughing. He couldn't stop coughing. He then couldn't breathe because he was coughing, then he couldn't catch his breath. Then he turned a lovely shade of purple. {I really do like the color; however, on a person, it is really not the best.} We did all that we were taught to do: more liquid drug, try to breathe slowly. Finally, after about 30 minutes of that, he calmed down. That was really a terrifying experience.

Rob's hospice nurse stopped by today. She took his oxygen level. It was at 78% {Rob swears it was 87%; however, he is doped up, so I hardly think that he is an expert on remembering things.} He started using oxygen whilst sleeping when he got pneumonia last month. Barb (nurse) told Rob that he needs to start wearing it all the time. If he is just sitting around not moving and decides to take a break, he may. His heart rate whilst resting is 100 bpm. When he moves from one side of the house to another (about 30 feet), it increases to about 120 bpm - this is like running up a hill for some of us. When I say that he moves, it is like a 99 year-old's steps. Slow and steady. He is EXHAUSTED all the time. Rob was wondering if this was because of the increase of his drugs. No. It is because his heart is having to work so much more than yours or mine. That is what lack of oxygen will do to you. Too bad we do not live in the age of Star Trek and they cannot run a medical tricorder over him and fix up his lungs. {We love Star Trek - in case you didn't know. Live long and prosper.}

Barb told me that I might want to think about working less and spending more time with Rob at home. My fantastic co-workers, Penny and Erin met with me today and we went over all of my job responsibilities and what they can do in my periodic absence. I spoke to my boss, Brent, and explained what was going on. He was 100% on-board with helping me do what I needed to do to support my family. I have such amazing friends that are so supportive and kind and caring.

Last summer Rob worked on some new sculptures and was able to get them fired. He was excited to get them back. When he feels better he is looking forward to finishing them. 

I had the best conversation with a friend of mine. Amy stopped by my desk yesterday and said that over the weekend she thought a lot about me. I asked her why. She said it was because of the beautiful warm weather. Huh?? I wondered what that had to do with me. I asked. She said it was 'because of my stupid blog.' At this point I am trying to figure out what I wrote...

"What did I write?" I asked.

"Well, you wrote that you told Rob he cannot die until the weather is warm. The weather is warm now. You now need to tell him he cannot die until the winter because of how great you look in wool."

That was so funny! I asked her if I could share our conversation. She said yes and that she was happy it was snowing yesterday.

Warning: this is a little more information than you probably want to know...Barb ordered a commode (toilet) for Rob to keep in our room. I believe I mentioned that he has a bladder the size of a walnut. He is constantly getting up in the middle of the night either to urinate or to have a coughing attack. Because his oxygen level is so low, she really doesn't want him walking the ridiculously short distance from our bed to the bathroom. Rob has told the kids that when it is their week to clean the bathroom, they will be in charge of emptying his "bathroom." They didn't think that was funny. At all. I thought it was hilarious.

Health Update

Rob is feeling a bit better now.

A good indicator of his health is whether he does anything during the day. If he just sleeps, he is unwell. If he engages in his artwork or makes cookies: it is a good day.

Over the last few weeks he has worked on painting, chip carving, and he made cookies. Triple whammy! Wahoo.

I am glad that the Levaquin seemed to work. After completing the course of antibiotics, his breathing  normalized a bit; however, it is not what it was prior to traveling to Florida. It seems to be especially bad while he is sleeping. He gets out of breath frequently. We take things slowly around our home.

His weight is steady. The only scale we own is the Wii Fit balance board. (Long story.) When he is feeling well, he does yoga (lately that has been almost daily). Before starting yoga, the program weighs him. So, long story short: Rob's weight has stayed pretty steady. This is a really good thing.

January 2012

This last month has been semi-eventful..

SCAN: Rob had his final scan (I asked special permission from our health plan). Do you recall in a previous post how I mentioned that I like numbers? The doctor who read the scan said this: "Numerous nodules are identified throughout the right upper lobe as well as the residual aspect of the right lower lung. The nodules are too numerous to count. Findings are concerning for lymphangitic tumor spread." {really?} No numbers. Rob was poked five times (in both arms) trying to find a vein (his veins seem to hide at the mere thought of being poked). Poor guy. Anyway. I was hoping to have some final numbers, but it was not to be. Bottom line: cancer growing.

CHRISTMAS: We were able to spend Christmas with Rob's sister, Angie, and her beautiful family. We packed clothing for the kids and surprised them the morning we left. It was a lot colder in Texas than we thought it would be (the humidity sure makes 40 degree weather feel A LOT colder than 40 here). Regardless of the temperature, it was a fantastic trip and many memories were made. We appreciated the hospitality of Angie and Chad and their willingness to share Christmas with us.

HEALTH UPDATE: Rob is doing well. He looks good. Because he is on steroids he has an appetite (he cannot stop eating). The food he likes to eat most is Pink Lady apples. Now, when he eats any other apple they are flavorless to him. The steroids also give him energy. One of the side effects of the steroids is that it gives him acne. Poor boy. He looks like he is 15 again. He is taking some antibiotics to help clear it up a bit. It seems to help.

Rob's pain meds have been changed again. When he started the hospice journey, he was only taking some long acting pain meds. Last week, they added some short acting pills as well. He hasn't been sleeping (and thus keeping me awake). I had been sick for three weeks with laryngitis and bronchitis. I was starting to fall apart from not sleeping. Monday last week, I called Barb and told her that Rob wasn't sleeping. I thought that he had anxiety. She came to the house and listened to Rob's lungs and talked with him. His left lung is sounding worse. After talking with Rob, Barb said that what is happening is he is not breathing as well. His brain and his lungs are not talking to each other. Subconsciously, he knows something is not right - that is why he cannot sleep. She added some pain medicine drops that work within ten minutes. These will help with him sleeping. We are almost one week out from the start of the drops. I can attest that it is helping. He sleeps now. {So do I.} It will take some time before his body adjusts to the change in the pain medicine. Right now, I have a husband that looks stoned most of the time. It is funny to see him. Last night right after the took his medicine he started talking to me. I couldn't understand him at all. It was hilarious. One of these days, I need to record him and post it here.

One thing that I have noticed is that the gurgling is picking up. It is not all the time. Sometimes, it wakes me up in the middle of the night. He is still coughing. Another medicine has been added. Rob was on an inhaler to help him breathe a little better. Camille (Rob's other hospice nurse) added a nebulizer. This is to make the albuteral get to his system a little slower and more evenly spaced.

ME & INFORMATION: As I mentioned before, I am a numbers gal. I love information. The more information I have, the better I cope. Through all this, I have asked Greg (oncologist) and Jane (palliative care) many questions. I expect straight-forward answers. In talking with them, they have explained that many patients (and their family members) ask for the same frankness; however, when it comes down to it they really do not want the frank answers. This whole cancer bit has become second hand to me now. We just marked our 6.5 year mark. I know how I operate. I have educated our hospice nurses to let them know my modus operandi.

Because I am at work, I am not at home to be a part of the hospice nurse visits. For the last 6.5 years, I have attended all of Rob's doctor's visits. As I already mentioned, I fare much better with more information. Wednesday, Rob showed me a chart he made. It helps him organize the 8+ medicines he needs to take. I noticed that they had added the short-acting pain medicine. I didn't even know that they added that a week ago. Wow. I feel like I have no control of this situation (I have never deluded myself into thinking that I did have control). At least in going to the doctor's appointments with Rob and asking questions, I knew that I had some semblance of control (at least in my mind). I suppose in a way, asking questions and getting answers dictates some sort of control: I am controlling the amount of information I am receiving.

Long story short: I am going to have Rob call me when Barb or Camille (Rob's other hospice nurse) come to the house. He can put the call on speaker and then I can 'be a part' of the appointment. I think this will help with me feeling helpless.

Incidentally, I have already told Rob under no circumstances is he to die in the winter. I refuse to wear a skirt and freeze off my heiny standing in the cold. He told me that he would do what he could. Hahaha.

KIDS: Our kids are doing well. We have a hospice volunteer coming to the house helping the kids to talk about 'feelings.' At this point, they are annoyed and don't like it. I think that at some point it really will help them. They are such good kids. They are amazing. Throughout all of this, they are still exceptional students. They seem happy. (We have told them that their school work is not to lapse - this whole cancer business is not an excuse to earn sub-standard grades.)

I think that I will be posting a little more frequently from this point forward.

Again, we are grateful for the love and support we constantly receive from family, friends, and even strangers. We are grateful for the miracle of the last 6.5 years. Our kids know their dad. We have created many memories. Life is good. God is good.

The Mother of all Updates

As you have ascertained, I have not updated this blog in SIX MONTHS! Yes, I know. There are reasons, none of which I will get into right now. Suffice it to say, it has been a bumpy road the last six months.

Chemotherapy has been awful. It seemed that the longer Rob was having chemo, the worse he felt. In August, we drove to California to visit my dad. Rob was supposed to get a chemo treatment the day before we left; however, after a conversation with his oncologist, we decided to wait until we arrived home. This was a nice five-week break (generally there are three weeks between treatments).

August: When we returned from California, we had a treatment. Soon after, Rob’s dizziness and nausea increased. Bruce, the nurse practitioner, had Rob walk down the hall like he was walking a tightrope. Needless to say, he failed miserably. {It was quite humorous to watch, actually.} Because he was having nausea with the dizziness, a brain MRI was scheduled. Bruce was worried about the cancer metastasizing to his brain.

It hadn’t. Phew. Another bullet dodged?

September: We ended up calling Intermountain Healthcare’s Balance Center. We found that (in addition to nasty chemo side effects) Rob has BPPV (Benign Paroxysmal Positional Vertigo) – otherwise known as ear crystals. This is why he had been walking around like a drunken sailor.

We had a CT scan at the end of September. It was hilarious. The radiologist wrote the report with minimal information regarding the growth of the tumors. {Wouldn’t you think that if the diagnosis was cancer one would give detailed information about the growth, rather than “slight progression of metastatic disease” as the best detail? Come on! We make treatment decisions based on these reports!} Anyway, I digress.

We went into the appointment with no better understanding of what the last scan showed than before we had the scan. Bruce was just as confused as we were. Hahah! So glad that it wasn’t just us that felt like the report was lacking. He sent a request to the radiologist to get detailed measurements. We went ahead and had chemo, because we weren’t sure about the scan report.

October: One week later we received a call from Bruce with the addendum report: there are several more tumors, most are growing, the largest tumor nearly tripled (now 9 cm x 4.5 cm) and the second largest nearly doubled (now 7 cm x 3.6 cm). Minimal changes? Really? Well, with that bit of information we decided to cease the chemotherapy treatment. Nine months of chemo was enough.

Another bit of fun information is that the scan showed that Rob had a kidney stone. Apparently, if one is drugged up enough, one doesn't feel a kidney stone. His brother and sister both had one this year and they were in so much pain. Rob said that they were wimps. He had an ultrasound two weeks later and apparently he passed the stone (again with no pain). Wow. He is Superman!

Mid-October: We spoke with the oncology doctor about other chemotherapy treatments. With one of the treatments, he would have nausea, hair loss (which screams cancer patient), fatigue, and joint & muscle pain. The other treatment would be all the side effects as in the first option, with the exception of hair loss. Since the chemo drugs he just finished made him sick, he would definitely become sick with the other treatments. The chance of the chemo working is cut in half and it we could expect that it would work half as long as before. Since the last drug lasted roughly nine months, then the new would work roughly four and one half months. As Dr. Litton was telling us all this he said that he was talking himself out of the chemo treatments as well. {Honestly, we had, had enough. The thought of treatment made Rob sick – and still does.}

November: Rob enjoyed thoroughly NOT having chemo treatments. We had family pictures done on his birthday.

December: We are supposed to just watch for the cancer side effects now. Increased fatigue, short of breath, losing weight.

Speaking of losing weight…Rob has lost 26 pounds since January. Most of that weight loss started in the middle of August. He weighs less than when we were married 18 years ago. Interestingly enough, did you know that cancer puts out hormones that make it impossible for your body to absorb calories? One could eat 4000 calories in a day and still lose weight. That is why people with cancer lose weight. I always thought that the calories were going to the cancer cells. Huh. See Rob's weight loss line chart below:

Thursday, December 1, after meeting with Jane (our palliative care doctor) we decided to be proactive in Rob’s care. We have started hospice. Before I go on, I would like to provide some education about hospice. The following definition of palliative care & hospice from NQF (National Quality Forum):

Palliative care refers to patient- and family-centered care that optimizes quality of life by anticipating, preventing, and treating suffering. Palliative care throughout the continuum of illness involves addressing physical, intellectual, emotional, social, and spiritual needs and facilitating patient autonomy, access to information, and choice.

Hospice care is a service delivery system that provides palliative care for patients who have a limited life expectancy and require comprehensive biomedical, psychosocial, and spiritual support as they enter the terminal stage of an illness or condition. It also supports family members coping with the complex consequences of illness, disability, and aging as death nears. Hospice care further addresses the bereavement needs of the family following the death of the patient.

Of particular importance, palliative care services are indicated across the entire trajectory of a patient’s illness and its provision should not be restricted to the end-of-life phase.

There have been studies that prove that when one is involved with hospice, they live longer and have a better quality of life versus receiving treatment until the bitter end. We are "choosing hospice to live, not to die" (the words of Jane). If you are interested in learning a little more about hospice and why someone would choose hospice, here is an article written by Atul Gawande, MD, titled “Letting Go.” This is not a short article (about 25 pages); however, it is well written and gives examples about hospice versus treatment. I would recommend this for anyone interesting in finding out more about hospice.

This is what I have learned so far with our interviews with the hospice people: Hospice consists of an interdisciplinary team. This group of people provide treatment at the patient’s house. The disciplines are: a nurse (for physical needs), a chaplain (for spiritual needs), and a social worker (for emotional needs). Additionally, volunteers come to the home to help out with respite care (for me), run errands (if needed), and help clean (wahoo!). So far, the folks at CNS are amazing. They are a well-oiled machine. Monday morning I received three phone calls to make appointments for the various professionals to come to our home for the initial assessments.

As time progresses, I hope to provide better communication in a more timely manner. I have been a bit overwhelmed the last six months. {Does anyone even read this anymore?}

Present day: As far as how Rob is feeling: his fatigue is picking up a bit. He still has energy; however, I can see it slowly evaporating from him like rain hitting the pavement on a hot summer day. He is coughing more. We both noticed it last week and it seems to be progressively getting worse. Soon, he will sound like a smoker. Haha. The thing I love most is when he is sleeping next to me and I hear him breathing. Sometimes, it is rattle-y. Well, at least he is breathing. His pain is well managed right now. {I need to mention that he is not dying right now. Rob is concerned that I am making it sound like he is withering away. He is much better than he was this time last year (remember the oxygen?); however, I watch him like a hawk and I see that he is a little more fatigued than last month. It is only a flesh wound.}

As you may have already figured out, Rob isn't working anymore. He is enjoying his 'early retirement'. He spends his time painting, drawing, reading, walking, doing yoga, taking the kids to school, cooking dinner {wow. I have a housewife!}, working at transferring our home videos to DVDs, and updating his personal history.

Before I sign off, I would be remiss if I did not mention a few notes of gratitude.

The folks at Otto Bock Healthcare (Rob’s employer) have been completely AMAZING. You know what you have done. I cannot even begin to relay the gratitude Rob and I feel for you and what a blessing you have been in our lives. We appreciate all the love and support you have given him and our family over the last (almost) ten years (6.5 of that has been life-with-cancer). It is unheard of these days for an employer to stick by an employee to the degree you have. We are eternally grateful.

Everyone at Utah Cancer Specialists – our entire cancer experience has been so positive. We appreciate the fantastic care you have given Rob. It has been such a pleasure seeing you every three weeks for so long!

Thank you to our families – for standing by, helping, loving, and supporting us. We know that you will continue to do so. We are so blessed to have such amazing families.

Thanks to our ward family for the words of support and encouragement. We appreciate you asking after Rob and commenting how much you enjoy seeing him at church. Yes, he does look fantastic (he is like a college boy again - he is 13 pounds heavier than Jacob and can wear Jake's pants now - from a size 34 waist to a 29).

Thanks to my work family. Working full-time would be awful if it weren’t for you. I am so blessed to have such good friends. Thank you for your support.

Thank you, my Arbonne family. You are so supportive and kind. I appreciate you.

We would like to thank God for the peace, love, and support we feel from Him. Without Him, I cannot imagine how much more difficult this journey would have been.

More updates to come!

With much love and gratitude,

Jessica

Update...

Rob just had a scan: no change from the previous in April. That is fabulous. Wahoo!

This scan was a little different than all others he has received. It was an angio CT. He had been having some pains in his lungs (different and more than usual) and some swelling in his legs. His palliative doc thought that he might be having a pulmonary embolism (blood clot in his lungs). She wanted to make sure that, that wasn't the case.

All clear on the clot front. Another bullet dodged?

He is still continuing with chemo every three weeks. He gets poisoned next week, in fact. When people see Rob, they say, "Wow, he looks great! He looks normal." He really does. He has lost ten pounds in just under two months. He doesn't eat near as much. In fact, looking at his plate yesterday and mine, I was really embarrassed how much food was on mine. I felt like Miss Piggy in all her glory. Oink...

People who have not experienced chemo first-hand, think of chemo like what is seen in the movies. Since real-life is not always like the movie, I thought I would share what this particular chemo does to Rob. The name of the drug is called Alimta.

• It does not make his hair fall out. I think that people are surprised that he is having chemo, since he still has hair.


• He mostly feels crummy for one week after. Someone asked me how quickly he can feel the effects of the chemo. The whole process takes about 1.5 hours. When we are driving home, he is feeling it.


• The day of chemo his face turns a funky yellowish-greenish color.


• The day after chemo, his face turns bright red and swells a little; think dodge ball. It is like he is burnt - he actually has a bunch of freckles from this chemo - it is called hyperpigmentation. His appetite is somewhat there. He eats, but not much (hence the weight loss).


• After the first week, he starts to feel a little better. Tired still, but not as the first week. A little nausea, but nothing that a bunch of pills won't help.


• He is exhausted, but cannot sleep. Too much on his brain? Not sure...


• The week right before, he starts to feel a little sick again. Nausea sets in again and he is very tired.


• He can function and do the things he needs to. He can help me around the house, play with the kids, drive himself to work for a few hours a day a couple days a week (not the chemo week, though). He just has to pace himself. He will take a nap for a few minutes or several hours, depending on how much he has done that day or week. He is not sitting in his cancer chair all day long.

I have tried to take a picture of him during the 'face of many colors' but he is pretty adamant that I don't. I guess he doesn't want that chronicled. Hmmm. Next week, we meet with Dr. Litton's PA, the palliative care doc, and get chemo. Cannot wait!

Round Three

I checked out for a little while. I think that I needed a non-cancer break. Forgive my lack-of-information...

It is interesting: the last few weeks have actually been good. Rob has been able to go to work for a few hours each day. He is completely exhausted when he gets back home, but he feels more like a human being than he has in a long while.

Yesterday was chemo day. It is funny how that works. One starts to feel a bit better and then it is chemo time again and it knocks one down on one's rear. We started the chemo prior to the appointment with the doctor as he was running two hours behind. (Thank goodness we had the chemo set up, right?) He is never that late - a fluke.

At any rate, it was a good appointment day. We talked with his doctor about what is next. We decided since Rob looks so much better than he did in December/January that the chemo must be doing something. He isn't coughing like he was, he is on oxygen only whilst sleeping, and his pain is being managed much better (thanks to Dr. Macpherson).

We have opted for one more round of chemotherapy and then we will have the scan a little over a week after that. Originally, we only agreed to three rounds of chemo. However, as far as we can tell (without a scan), it seems to be helping a bit, so it seemed prudent to get one more round in. Additionally, all of his scans have been three months apart. They also have generally shown an increase of 60%. If we were to get a scan after two months, it would be difficult to compare with older scans. Based on his clinical improvement (and the scan results), he can continue for one or two more rounds of his current drugs. If he shows response (meaning: growing as fast as it has) after that the additional rounds of chemo, then we would get rid of the carboplatin drug and keep on the alimpta drug as a type of maintenance.

Next chemotherapy: three weeks
Next scan: first week of April

Again, we are so grateful for the love and support we have received from so many countless people.

Chemo Shmeemo

Thursday was a big day. We met with Rob's oncologist, a palliative care physician, and had chemo.

Rob's oxygen saturation levels were extraordinary! 97% on two liters of oxygen. Wahoo....!!!

He has lost another pound since February 3. Not alarming, but he is down seven pounds since December.

We told his oncologist how awful his first chemo week was, what with all the puking, feeling like puking, and sleeping. His oncologist told us that he was going to add an IV drug called Amend prior to the chemo to help with the nausea. He also added a few more prescription drugs to help with the post-chemo nausea.

We started the chemo and whilst waiting for the blood work to come back, Rob and I decided to run an experiment. He took off his oxygen and then we retested his levels after 25 minutes. His levels were at 93%. So, after talking to the nurse, we decided to only use his oxygen when he is exercising or sleeping. He is so happy about that. I am still waiting for the pulse oximeter I ordered forever ago to arrive to double check and make sure he is getting enough.

The palliative doctor was fantastic. She went over all Rob's medicine and told us how he should better utilize the medicine he is taking. Up until this point, he was taking so many at random times for this or for that.

Last chemo go-round he was soooooooo sick the day after. This time around he has been really good. There is some nausea and fatigue, but not near as bad as it was last time. Funny thing, though. He has the worst hiccups. (If you remember, which you probably don't, last treatment in 2005, he had terrible hiccups and required a prescription drug to take care of it - it didn't help the fact that he was still healing from his lung surgery.) We are trying a few different things right now: Maalox Advanced, GasX (I know, right? Who would have thought?), and a prescription drug for his nausea that may help with the hiccups. We will see.

We took a small walk today. It was nice to get him outside, but he was exhausted when we were done. (It was uphill, to his credit.)

Thank you for all the kind words, thoughts, and deeds on our behalf! We are very, very grateful.

Eat, Drink, & Be Merry

Ahhh. The last few days (compared to the two weeks prior) have been good. Rob has eaten almost like normal. Wahoo! He is still tired, but really, the last few days have been good. He was even making jokes. This is a huge thing, since last week, I think that he would have just assumed crawling into a six-foot hole. His nausea is just about gone (thus the eating).

We visited his oncology office to get some blood work done. His levels are pretty low (duh - he just had chemo), but not alarmingly so. He is highly susceptible to catching any kind of illness, so we try to keep people at bay. If someone comes to our home, we spray them down with sanitizer.

His oxygen levels were FANTASTIC! They were 98% on four liters of oxygen. They lowered it to two and tested him ten minutes later. It was 96%. They decided that we could leave it at two. I purchased a pulse oximeter so we could test his blood oxygen levels at home. No more guessing - or assuming that he is getting enough (or not) oxygen.

He is on day nine after his last dose of Levaquin (antibiotic). He is already noticing a difference how he feels; he is coughing more and he has more pain. Thank goodness for drugs to help ease the pain. Hopefully, this vicious cycle of pneumonia on and off again will end.

One week from today, he will have another round of chemotherapy. We are looking forward (with much trepidation) to the days following. We are preparing for much vomit and sleeping (hopefully not at the same time).

I'm Not Dead Yet

On the way home from church today, Rob said to me, "I think that people think that I am close to dying. They seem surprised to see me walking around. They think that I should be on death's bed because the cancer is back."

I was talking to Elaine about it and she got the same feeling while talking to others. I was concerned that I said something in the blog, that he has one foot in the grave and the other is hanging perilously close to the edge. She assured me that I have not.

I know that recurrent cancer is not always a good thing, but seriously, he is not dead yet.

Dead men don't hike to Lake Katherine (or is it Catherine???) (three-hour round trip hike - uphill both ways! hehehe). We did this on Friday. He did, however, take a nice nap when we returned - but he did hike well.

To illustrate this, please read the the following quote from the immortal movie "Monty Python's Holy Grail:"

"The Dead Collector: Bring out yer dead. [a man puts a body on the cart]
Large Man with Dead Body: Here's one.
The Dead Collector: That'll be ninepence.
The Dead Body That Claims It Isn't (Rob): I'm not dead.
The Dead Collector: What?
Large Man with Dead Body: Nothing. There's your ninepence.
The Dead Body That Claims It Isn't: I'm not dead.
The Dead Collector: 'Ere, he says he's not dead.
Large Man with Dead Body: Yes he is.
The Dead Body That Claims It Isn't: I'm not.
The Dead Collector: He isn't.
Large Man with Dead Body: Well, he will be soon, he's very ill.
The Dead Body That Claims It Isn't: I'm getting better.
Large Man with Dead Body: No you're not, you'll be stone dead in a moment.
The Dead Collector: Well, I can't take him like that. It's against regulations.
The Dead Body That Claims It Isn't: I don't want to go on the cart.
Large Man with Dead Body: Oh, don't be such a baby.
The Dead Collector: I can't take him.
The Dead Body That Claims It Isn't: I feel fine.
Large Man with Dead Body: Oh, do me a favor.
The Dead Collector: I can't.
Large Man with Dead Body: Well, can you hang around for a couple of minutes? He won't be long.
The Dead Collector: I promised I'd be at the Robinsons'. They've lost nine today.
Large Man with Dead Body: Well, when's your next round?
The Dead Collector: Thursday.
The Dead Body That Claims It Isn't: I think I'll go for a walk.
Large Man with Dead Body: You're not fooling anyone, you know. Isn't there anything you could do?
The Dead Body That Claims It Isn't: I feel happy. I feel happy. [the Dead Collector glances up and down the street furtively, then silences the Body with his a whack of his club] (Rob has since banned all clubs in our home.)
Large Man with Dead Body: Ah, thank you very much.
The Dead Collector: Not at all. See you on Thursday.
Large Man with Dead Body: Right."